Get all 70 miscellaneous owl releases available on Bandcamp and save 50%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of you are the light that casts a shadow, Blind Spot, Sink or Swim, little fires, Skyway, Mother's Day, the engine of more, tracing paper (covers vol. 1), and 62 more.
1. |
Streaks
03:51
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I wish I knew how to write a jazz song
Something you would have liked
I thought this would be easier to write
I thought that grief would tear it out of me
But grief lingers with surprisingly gentle fingers
Too weak and soft to cut the comet from its packaging
I had a dream about you the other night
I was on my way to meet you
All the westbound trains were running late
You said you had to go, you couldn't wait
You hung up the phone and suddenly I was awake
And I know it's been 826 days
Since the last time that I saw your face
You'd be proud of me, I'm keeping up my streak
Because I wanted to speak fluently the next time that I came to Barcelona
And I know it's been 826 days
Since the last time that I saw your face
You'd be proud of me, I'm keeping up my streak
Because I wanted to speak fluently the next time that I came to Barcelona
It's weird to think that 18 years is the longest I'll ever have known you
I still see your ghost appear in mailing lists and aliases
Streaks upon the window glass that don't get cleaned away
The night we left the restaurant, I turned round to wave
And suddenly you were gone
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2. |
Scallops
02:22
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Babe, what a time to be born into this world
The cities are sinking and the walls are tumbling down into the sea
But I'm glad to see you
You see, the world's been waiting to sing you to sleep
The willows stop weeping and the wind forgets to breathe
So you can dream, little bean
I wish you the blessings of the dandelions sighing to the clouds
And the candy wrappers lying on the ground
And the pigeons in their silken ascot ties
And the scallops in the ocean with their pale blue eyes
Babe, may everything around you keep you safe
I wish you the blessings of the ducks out on the lake
And the frogs and snakes and all their babies
I wish you the blessings of the electric lines running overhead
And the tabby cats curled up in their beds
And the puddles that shimmer in the rain
And the city bus that's always running late
And the Christmas trees with all their shining lights
And the scallops in the ocean with their pale blue eyes
And the scallops in the ocean with their pale blue eyes
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3. |
Closing the Capsule Door
03:33
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In her helmet, the first cosmonaut dreams of rabbits,
And of bacon, and of sunlight on the floor
Laika, little lemon, little bug, they adored you
They'll mourn for you
Even as they're closing the capsule door
Love means so many things
That's what we tell ourselves
Doing what is necessary
Giving thanks for the dead canary
Love means so many things
(Still believing that it's love)
Love means so many things
I choose a cage and lift the mice into a plastic box
Feeling like I'm the only one holding a gun on the firing squad
Prey test with a trail cam, I'm picking the sacrificial lambs
In the dark, I kneel and let them go,
And as I leave, I see the owl swoop low
Love means so many things
That's what we tell ourselves
Doing what is necessary
Giving thanks for the dead canary
Love means so many things
(Still believing that it's love)
Love means so many things
And oh, I got into the car and drove away
Just like I promised that I never would
And oh, I wanted to make it a proper ending
With a photograph and everyone pretending to feel good
Love means so many things
That's what we tell ourselves
Doing what is necessary
Giving thanks for the dead canary
Love means so many things
(Still believing that it's love)
Love means so many things
(Still believing that it's love)
Love means so many things
Love means so many things
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4. |
Cake
03:33
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I'm not beautiful
I'm not as cool as the other girls
I can't sing like them
I'm not thin like them
Everything I've said about loving myself is a lie
I can't even look myself in the eye
Everyone knows that I'm borrowing somebody else's life for a while
I'm just pretending
I don't know why I do this anymore
I'm walking along a path I've walked before
Arm in arm with the ghosts of the people I've been before
Everyone knows that I'm borrowing somebody else's life for a while
I'm just pretending
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5. |
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Taking the train home, thinking about our kiss
Like an animal, the telephone buzzes and butts against my hip
I wrote your name on the back of my hand
Because I thought you were leaving
I dreamed
I was filling the Trevi Fountain with blood
Down the long corridor pouring paint on the floor and then waiting for the paint to dry
I am stranded in the city in the clouds
Slow minutes drift by
Thought you were a fling
But I'm discovering I can't live without you
If I were a king,
I'd be ordering them to put your favorite show back on the air
I want to see you laughing out loud
You turn my figures to ground
Everything's scenery now
You are the light in the scene that casts a shadow
In the bright gallery stabbing secrets to death with a pin
I see the skull beneath the skin
Time's the enemy, but death doesn't faze me
I'm waiting for your mouth to save me
I want to see you laughing out loud
You turn my figures to ground
Everything's scenery now
You are the light in the scene that casts a shadow
You are the light that casts a shadow
You are the light that casts a shadow
You are the light that casts a shadow
You are the light that casts a shadow
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6. |
Goodbye, Westfield
02:57
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Six o'clock and the subway is filled with faces in a faceless crowd
And the beautiful thing about the subway is being nameless
Nobody speaks your name out loud
Wasted hours flutter past
And get crushed upon the tracks
Nobody around here seems to laugh
Like a sea of photographs
I remember when this city was smaller and weirder and wild
They always say you can't go back again
(Leaves are flying)
But here I am wishing for the past again
(In the silence)
Walking the streets of my old city like a stranger
(While the wind blows)
And everything around me smells of weariness and danger
(Does the wind know?)
Dead mall beside the freeway where we used to go
Dead mall in the heart of downtown San Francisco
Goodbye, Westfield
And now the city is full of cities full of tents
It's intense and invisible and sad
What were the dreams that we had?
You'll have to remind me
I remember when our futures were bigger and weirder and wild
They always say you can't go back again
(Leaves are flying)
But here I am wishing for the past again
(In the silence)
Walking the streets of my old city like a stranger
(While the wind blows)
And everything around me smells of loveliness and danger
(Does the wind know?)
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7. |
Millefiori
02:44
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Everything was going well
Biblically accurate angels appeared overhead
Their eyelash extensions slashing the clouds bloody red
And she said, babe,
Do you love me?
Do you love me?
Everything was going well
The ram and the serpent were trampling the city to dust
The glass and the concrete mixing with flowers and rust
And she said, babe,
Do you love me?
Do you love me?
And she said, babe,
Do you love me?
Do you love me?
And she said, babe,
Do you love me?
Do you love me?
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8. |
jamie's halo
02:40
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Jamie's got a halo and I don't even know why
That's the way it has to be, she's the queen, she's the leader of the colony
Pinky swear with blood, no words, just love, and a bottle of wine
Best friends she said it in the end, we'll be Golden Girls together till we die
She's got a ticket for the sun, going nowhere, going home
She's got a ticket for the stars
So let's put it all away, forever and a day, say that we'll never change, you'll always be my best friend
Dandelion clocks, embroidery floss, unbreakable chains, hair and makeup
We're blocking out the scene of Jamie and me talking about how things are changing
I memorized the lines, but I didn't rehearse, but Jamie is worse, so many wrong words
Still we're stumbling through to get to the ending
She's got a ticket for the sun, going nowhere, going home
She's got a ticket for the stars
So let's put it all away, forever and a day, say that we'll never change, you'll always be my best friend
Ooh
She's got a ticket for the sun, going nowhere, going home
She's got a ticket for the stars
So let's put it all away, forever and a day, say that we'll never change, you'll always be my best friend
So let's put it all away, forever and a day, say that we'll never change, you'll always be my best friend
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9. |
Tanager and Cardinal
03:33
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Red
Red bird in the branches
Sing to your lover
Sing back the sun
Northern cardinal
High in the limbs of the old bur oak tree
Scarlet tanager
Sing for the spring and the sun returning
Sing for the spring and the sun returning
Sing for the spring and the sun returning
I lay back on the stone
And let your axe split me open
Along the grain like cordwood
I am a crystal
I am an ocean
I am a canyon
I am a stone
Red feathers
Strewn on the sidewalk
I am a serpent
I am the sun
Northern cardinal
High in the limbs of the old bur oak tree
Scarlet tanager
Sing for the spring and the sun returning
Northern cardinal
High in the limbs of the old bur oak tree
Scarlet tanager
Sing for the spring and the sun returning
Sing for the spring and the sun returning
Sing for the spring and the sun returning
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10. |
Mascara and Magnesium
03:13
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Nothing's wrong
I'm just asleep on my feet
Picking my way through the holes between the hours
Taking care of myself
Wash my hair, brush my teeth
Monday night
Time to put the piece in play
Picking up my keys again
Making rounds in the world of men
Now I'm lying on the mat under a plywood sky
The room feels dark and so do I
Constructive rest
Pushing the boulder from my chest
I'm driving to the drugstore in the bitter dusk
Buying mascara and magnesium
Needing something new just to feel something
The doctor nods and smiles
But then I see in his notes
He says that I'm denying it
But that's not what I said at all
Automatic writing with a monkey's paw
Serotonin dropping from the vending machine claw
What if the world but too much?
What if myself but not enough?
Maybe I just need to spend more time away from screens
More gratitude
More vitamin D
Monday night
Time to put the piece in play
Picking up my keys again
Making rounds in the world of men
Now I'm lying on the mat under a plywood sky
The room feels dark and so do I
Constructive rest
Pushing the boulder from my chest
I'm driving to the drugstore in the bitter dusk
Buying mascara and magnesium
Needing something new just to feel something
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11. |
Chicago Rat Hole
04:15
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It's been a hard year
I'm losing count of the friends that I lost
Didn't have time between
To go and dry clean my designated funeral dress
(Yeah, I've got a designated funeral dress now)
Still don't know how to say goodbye
Thinking "I love you"
Then swallowing the words a thousand times
When I say, "So what is art for anyway?"
What I mean is I'd like to go down into the heart of the dark machine
That promises I'll never have to feel this way again
There's a hole in Roscoe Park in the shape of a rat
Just going about its business one day when it got squashed flat
In class, I carve the mold away into an empty animal shape
In the negative space, the deepest holes rise up to form a face
Still don't know how to say goodbye
Thinking "I love you"
Then swallowing the words a thousand times
When I say, "So what is art for anyway?"
What I mean is I'd like to go down into the heart of the dark machine
That promises I'll never have to feel this way again
It was Jen's birthday today and I watched the moon rise over the lake
Thinking about holes, thinking about failure
If I could only time travel, I could go back and save her
Or at least go back and say: I love you, goodbye, and I'll see you later
Still don't know how to say goodbye
Thinking "I love you"
Then swallowing the words a thousand times
When I say, "So what is art for anyway?"
What I mean is I'd like to go down into the heart of the dark machine
That promises I'll never have to feel this way again
Promises I'll never have to feel this way again
Promises I'll never have to feel this way again
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12. |
Honey-Eater
04:02
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The problem with time is that it's always happening.
I mean, I say that's the problem but that's also the great thing about it.
You actually never really die. You're a change in texture.
You appear for a while, you go offstage,
Maybe you reappear. Because the whole thing is kind of circular.
Like the circular towel in a gas station bathroom.
It's all very Jeremy Bearimy.
But the question is: who is the one on the outside looking at that circle
or that bear? Whatever it is that goes loping by
So that you only catch a glimpse of it in the corner of your eye
(Sole oscuro
Fuoco, fumo
Ho paura
Niente durerà)
Nel mezzo del cammin di nostra vita
mi ritrovai per una selva oscura,
ché la diritta via era smarrita.
So in a lot of Slavic languages, the word for bear means "honey-eater"
And our own word for bear means "the brown one."
They didn't ever want to call the bear by its real name, in case it heard them, and came.
Imagine being a salmon and seeing a bear.
Just this big shadow looming over the surface of the water. Everything rippling.
It's too big to even figure out how close or far it is.
It could be the shadow of a cloud.
And then this big paw breaks the surface of the water.
Massive claws. And just comes right down at you.
Just imagine that moment. It's got to be weird.
Keep in mind that at that point, the salmon are feeling pretty fucked up.
When they start to spawn, they completely change shape.
They grow a hump. Their jaw changes. They grow fangs.
They change color. They stop eating.
They just stop eating for the rest of their lives.
And they start swimming, and that's usually when the bears come,
because when the salmon are spawning, the rivers are full of them,
Hundreds of salmon. Thousands of salmon
Splashing and struggling towards where they were born,
slash, where they're going to die.
The alpha and the omega.
What do you think it feels like to be God?
Like, imagine you're that being sitting on the outside, pulling the gas station bathroom towel down,
watching it loop again and again.
Watching the same little stains go by over and over again, like old friends.
Did you know that every record ends with a locked groove to keep the needle from going off the edge?
Sometimes it's silent, there's nothing on it. We don't even think about it when that happens.
And sometimes it's a loop.
Those are the ones we notice.
Like that weird thing at the end of "A Day in the Life"
Where they just keep on repeating "Never could see any other way"
"Never could see any other way"
"Never could see any other way"
Everything just keeps going and going.
I really miss him sometimes.
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miscellaneous owl Madison, Wisconsin
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